The Girl
Me, Myself & I
Family and friends are the best gifts on Earth.
Hug me and I'll hug you back ♥
Benson Choo ♥
January 2012 /
May 2012 /
August 2012 /
September 2012 /
October 2014 /
20:40 Tuesday, 21 October 2014
"If this was how you felt, I feel 10 times worse." - I hinted. But if only you could understand how I feel all these years.
Not sure when did this start happening, but I am pretty sure it gets worse since Year 2-3. I seem to have been the only one drifted away from this friendship, particularly from you. I am never the choice for you to rely on or seek advice from. Not that I want you to depend on me, but you have to admit that we don't know each other well anymore.
Extra effort is always needed to close an eye whenever there is an impromptu/meet-out/outing/whatever without me. I never hurl a word at all because I really believe that the main reason for us to drift apart is because I am attached. So obviously, I can't complain. However as time goes by and it is still happening as usual, I don't feel very positive about it. You are too cropped up with work and friends that I feel like I am that part which you have no time to put aside for. Moreover, I feel that your words are just plain words that you have to say without actually mean it. Perhaps you mean it, but you didn't realise your behaviour contradicts yourself. Just look at the most recent event, you have almost nothing to say to me.
Lastly... Your bias-ness. I really dislike the thought of being unappreciated. I've tried to demolish those unhealthy thoughts away and believe in you. Some things are just so hard especially when the same thing goes on and nothing has been done to mend the friendship~ You are worth my time, but I am kinda sick of closing my eyes all the time. Tonight will just be another normal night where I am to close an eye again and visual myself out of the picture.
This is not an emotional day or whatsoever. Just thoughts on how close friends say and act otherwise. Thought that I could keep this to my heart because I have already been doing so for 3 years as well as a boyfriend who will always be here for me so it won't matter to me in any way.
But as usual, the self-consoling system has to proceed..
"No big deal, it's just another day of being an unimportant friend ~"
I have to admit at times like this, I am really glad that I have a boyfriend to be here for me no matter what happens ♥♥♥